This week has been another fun week. I had the opportunity to go to the performance of Don Giovanni at National Art Center in Ottawa. Last week we attended the performance of Bach's piano concerto #3 and it was fantastic so we decided to go again. As I have never been to an Opera we had no idea what to expect. I have decided I explore new things and Its part of our mission to just do stuff even it might suck. Well, it did not suck, in fact it was highly entertaining. The music was incredible, I have never heard anyone with the ability to sing like that before. They hit impossibly high notes and were able to perform for 2 hours from memory in Italian. I was blown away by the professionalism.
I am very inspired by these performers, especially the musicians last week. When I think about the hours they have spent working on their craft. In order to perform for those two hours they no doubt practiced for weeks in preparation. The end result is pure perfection. It is also a reminder that you have to work for the things you want, but dedication pays of in the end. I want to have this same dedication to something in my own life. I have not found that thing that grabs me deeply yet, but I am determined to explore until I it. It's exciting not to know what the future holds, and I am getting glimpses into the possibilities. I have the opportunity to live a life that previously I had only dreamed.
The whole experience of venturing downtown was so enlivening, the lights, people milling around generating a dynamic energy. I love the opportunity to get all dressed up and be surrounded by refinement is fun. I wore a dress that in the past I likely never would have had the guts to wear in public. Women were around me wearing their gowns, I loved it.
The feeling of electricity, and a sense of a new beginning. Its evidence am in control of my life now and that I get to experience my way. One of my worries while I was married was I would regret staying in the long run. I know for sure that had I stayed I would without doubt had regretted it. I would never be able to do these things with him. As I walked out out of the venue I reflected on how this is something I was meant to be doing during my university days. Discovering new worlds that might have lead me down some different paths. My university is only a couple hundred meters from the venue, and I had lived within walking distance. I had a weird feeling of being that young girl again, the one that was looking at the world through dirty glass trapped by obligations I had taken on before I was ready or even really wanted them. I could see this world around me, but I was never able to be part of it. These were the opportunities I missed out on, and I think I have always harbored resentment towards my ex because of it. I always knew deep down I was not living the life I wanted.
As I mentioned, I had no idea what to expect. We started off with grabbing some drinks and we headed to our seats. We were seated as the orchestra was warming up. I love the warm up, it may even being my favorite part. its all disorganized and a bunch of random sounds and for some reason reminds me of the high school band taking me back in time for a moment. It also give me the feeling of truly being alive and stokes my anticipation for the show. And when the show starts, the lights go down a pregnant silence fills the room right before your get hit with the wave of sound that rolls out from the stage. I love it. While listening I imagine the audiences that first heard this opera in Vienna in 1782. Before the inundation of constant stimulation from our present media dominated lives, this performance must of been a feast for the viewer. I could imagine them in their gowns, powdered wigs and cooling themselves with their little fans.
Now for the best part, the story of Don Giovanni. I have often heard the phrase "he is a real Don Juan" when referring to a man that goes around seducing women all over the place. It turns out this opera is the origin of that phrase. Don Giovanni portrays himself as a charming embodiment of every woman's dreams until he has seduced them, at which point he tosses them aside. I was laughing at how familiar the story line was too me. I have met these men lol. Even the part where one of his wronged conquests tried to warn a new one and Don Giovanni claimed she was just jealous and crazy. How appropriate that this was one of my first experiences in the performance arts. I definitely relate to the story line. However, in Don Giovanni the good guys do eventually win, and Don Juan (Giovanni) ends up being taken by the devil.
Its so refreshing and invigorating being able to go out like this. I find it really energizing as well, all work no play makes Carolynne a dull girl. Finally my turn. I am feeling alive again, its been a very long time.